newbuzz...As the year comes to a close, there are many things I am glad to be putting behind me. Through careful planning, I can say goodbye to over spending, overdrafts, and indigestion. But what I really want to kiss farewell is the uncertainty that has brought out the worst in me as my job was eliminated and I faced the daunting task of finding a new one. I have landed a new job that will begin in January. It will keep me from collecting unemployment insurance checks from my government. It will allow me and my family to enjoy health insurance. I will have some measure of financial security. But more than that, it will allow me to rebuild the work persona that was cultivated over my entire adult life. Though we are not supposed invest our worth in our employment status, most Americans do so. Our identities are intricately woven into our economic status and when there is an interruption, we begin to question the path we have taken, and to doubt our choices. Anyway, I did. Did I work hard enough? Did I save enough money? Did I give too much away? Was it smart to take out loans for school? Will I find another job? What if I lose my house? What will people think of me now? Was it my fault that my job was eliminated? These are things that do not make for good dinner conversation and they are better left unsaid when you are unemployed and vulnerable. But now that I have a job, I can answer some of these questions in ways that favor my decision making. I realize that I am lucky to have found a job, and that I am healthy enough to work. But I will never forget the fragility that is felt when teetering on the brink of disaster. I have become stronger in spirit because of this experience. I have also become more generous of heart, especially for those who are less fortunate than I have been. And through it all, I have emerged more hopeful and more positive than ever before. I have seen firsthand how solutions can fall into place at exactly the right time to avoid trouble. I know that faith can carry me through uncertainty and fear. I am looking forward to a new year and new blessings to be thankful for.

newbuzz...I have seen the movie Precious, and read the novel Push, by Sapphire that it was based uopn. I saw the movie at the Lagoon theater in uptown Minneapolis on the early Sunday matinee. There was a good crowd for noon on Sunday. Most people in attendance were middle aged, like me. The movie was rough, raw, and thoroughly sobering as it dealt with the childhood physical and sexual abuse suffered by the lead character, Precious, a sixteen year old girl, at the hands of her parents. When the movie was over, the entire audience filed out in silence. It was so disturbing that we were all lost in our own thoughts, each wondering how this movie represents the real life abuse that is happening all around us. I was both saddened and angered by the subject, as I wondered who is out there protecting powerless children. The movie impacted my days in such a way, that I wanted to read the actual book that is was based upon. I got the book, Push, by Sapphire and quickly read it in an afternoon. The writing was so real, and so compelling, that I have yet to get the story off my mind. Now, I can appreciate the movie for taking a completely uncensored novel of horrors and making it palatable for general audiences while retaining all of the details that fuel the audience outrage for the subject matter. After reading the book, I am both discouraged and hopeful. I am discouraged and deeply saddened for all of the children, and young adults who have suffered abuse at the hands of friends, relatives, and the social systems that have failed them. I am hopeful that the human spirit can endure the worst torture and still survive and even thrive in the face of love. I am determined to put my love into action at every opportunity. This means I must be watchful and investigate situations I may encounter that could be harmful to children. I must be vocal in my distaste of child endangerment and pornography whenever it presents itself. I must let social workers, educators, politicians, and lawmakers know that I prioritize the safety of children and I want my tax dollars used efficiently and effectively on their behalf. I will not laugh at off color jokes, email forwards, or stupid television shows and comedy skits that seek to desensitize adults to the abuse of children by making it seem harmless or funny. Finally, I must keep an open mind and an open heart to generously support children and adults who have endured abuse and neglect, for they are survivors and should be treated with respect, kindness, and love.

newbuzz...I want to make Spritz cookies for Christmas. I have a cookie press that I got many years ago. The problem is that the Christmas tree disc is missing from my set. It has been lost along the way and now I cannot make Spritz cookies for Christmas. I always make green trees, red wreaths, and white swirls. It is a tradition. I have the secret Swedish Spritz recipe from my great - grandma. They are better than the Norwegian kind. I have gone to many stores looking for a replacement cookie press. Alas, the old fashioned, MIRRO, aluminum cookie press with the twist top is not to be found in stores. They no longer make them. Now it is a vintage item that must be found in a second hand store. I have tried the new, plastic cookie press models; the cookie shooter, and the cookie gun. Neither one works as well as the old aluminum one that I have. The makers of these new cookie presses have obviously never made Spritz cookies. If they had, they would know that cookie bakers do not really mind the twist top. In fact, it works very well. The most important detail though, is that Spritz cookies are made with real butter and the dough is very sensitive to temperature. The aluminum press can be chilled or warmed depending on what is needed to press the dough into perfectly formed Christmas trees, wreaths, and swirls. New is not always improved. I like the old one better.

newbuzz...The blizzard arrived right on schedule. We received 12 inches of snow. It is 13 degrees and the wind is blowing. Drifting has begun, and driving is treacherous. In the small town where I live, the streets have been plowed, but there is no sand or salt on them yet. I wanted to get to the grocery store three blocks away, but needed to take the car in order to get my groceries home. Thanks to my husband, our driveway was cleared and I pulled right out without any trouble. From there, it took six tries before I was able to clear the hill that is our city street and get on the main street to town. Normally, our street would be sanded by about 7:00 a.m. It is now 4 p.m. and it has not been done yet. I have a feeling that this is one of the casualties of a tight economy. If we are not going to have the streets and roads cleared, sanded, and passable as have become accustomed to, I fear there will be many more fender benders and accidents. While I was at the grocery store, I bought a bucket of ice melt to keep in the car. When I got home, I put the shovel in the back seat and located the scraper. The only thing left to do is update my winter survival kit, and remember to slow down.

newbuzz...Blizzard in Minnesota. We are expecting 12 inches of snow overnight, 30 mph winds and temperatures below 20 degrees. I am cozy at home; snug as a bug in a rug. I do not have to get to work tomorrow and my husband is home with me. I am keenly aware of how my expectations change my perception of the situation. If I knew that we had to get to work in the morning, I would be stressing out already. I would have to wake up early, get the driveway cleared and hope that my hill would be plowed so I could get to work. Then I would worry about the treachery of driving in winter conditions. But, since I do not have to get to work tomorrow, I am able to enjoy the beauty of the snowflakes as they sparkle to earth. I will get up in the morning and watch the birds in the feeder and the chubby squirrel who is able to pull corn kernels from the corncob we have hung from the tree outside the window. I will finish a cup of coffee before I head out to shovel snow. I will watch the news and be thankful that I do not have to fight the weather to get to work. Though I do not like having both of us unemployed, I do like knowing we will be safe in this extreme weather. I wonder about the productivity of those who do make it work after confronting a blizzard. I hope that many schools and businesses will shut down tomorrow so that everyone can enjoy the snow day.

newbuzz...I am watching the news report about Amanda Knox, the American girl living in Italy who has now been convicted, along with her boyfriend of murdering her female roommate in a mysterious sex crime. She and her parents claim that there is no evidence linking her to the crime. Amanda says that the police abused and disrespected her as soon as she was arrested. That may be true. She may be innocent. She may have connected with a bad guy and ignorantly followed him into trouble. The fact is: she has been convicted. American citizens who leave the United States should be especially careful of who they spend time with and what they are doing. Why test the judicial system of any foreign country? If there is such a thing as being too cynical, then there is just as surely a state of foolish trust. There is good and bad all over the world, and people should listen to their instincts to tell the difference. When instinct fails, common sense and critical thinking must take over to avoid trouble. Whether or not Amanda conspired to commit murder is something only she and her boyfriend know for sure. If she is innocent of murder, she remains guilty of stupidity,complacency, and befriending a young man of questionable character.

newbuzz...I have watched another season of The Biggest Loser. This is a TV reality game show where several overweight men and women are assembled and pitted against one another in an effort to lose weight. Each week, one or two contestants are sent home by their peers based on their amount of weight lost and whether or not they are a threat to other players. In the end, there is one winner; the one who loses the highest percentage of total body weight. The winner gets a cash prize of $250,000.00 and the chance to earn money doing product endorsements and becoming a spokesperson for the show. Each year, the contestants have become larger and the weight losses more dramatic. Now contestants are disappointed when they lose less than ten pounds per week. The two weight loss coaches from the show have become very popular outside of the show and now endorse many products associated with health and wellness. I have two opinions of this show and the weight loss movement it has sparked. Since I am overweight and under active, I know the benefits I would reap by changing my unhealthy habits. With that in mind, I cannot condemn a show that promotes healthy weight through healthy eating and exercise. However, I also realize that the show sets unrealistic standards that most people cannot attain without the aid of a television trainer. With this in mind, I am afraid that this show makes it easy for our culture to continue in the harsh treatment of overweight people in mainstream society. The idea is that these fat people are "less than" their thin counterparts. Once they lose weight, they are not only healthy, they are happy and beautiful, and more worthy. But is is not the fat that is to blame for ill health, unhappiness, or an unsightly appearance. Rather, it is the moral fiber of the individual. Over and over we watch as these obese actors from real life are broken down until they reveal their deepest secrets, which must then be obliterated by force of will and by making a choice to overcome them. Once purged of their shame, these second class citizens are transformed into beautiful swans, worthy of a place in modern society. I recognize a grain of truth here, but I am disconcerted by the disdain we are lulled into feeling for the original forms of the contestants. They are people after all, whether fat or thin. But we do not like them until they have made the choice to be thin. We watch their struggles, knowing that until they give in, until they break down, until they reveal their deepest sorrows, they are "less than" the rest of us. Weight loss and weight control are complicated issues in America today, and shows like this feed the need to criticize others so that we can feel better about our own imperfections. So we walk around measuring our worth by our looks, our weight, and who we feel "better than". I am aware of the absurdity of this kind of thinking, yet I cannot deny my own desire for perfect health, weight, and beauty. No doubt we would benefit from a follow up with these contestants a couple years after their big weight loss transformations. I would like to hear what they have to say about their happiness, both before, and after the weight loss. I would like to know if their happiness is measured in inches and pounds and whether or not it is an internal measurement, or one that society has imposed upon them.

newbuzz...There are some things you expect to happen when you lose your job. Things like losing your insurance, loss of, or decrease in income. You know you will feel sad, uncertain, even angry at times. My husband and I have experienced all of these as we have both lost our jobs due to economic lay offs. But, there has been a silver lining in this gray cloud too. Now we have a better awareness of our finances and our future goals than ever before. We have always been aware of what we are doing, but in the race to get three students through college, we have been avoiding some of the hard questions that should be answered periodically. Do we need to buy this right now? Can we pay back this debt? What if we lose our jobs? Those questions are pushed to the forefront when you are facing the extreme income reduction of two lost jobs in one family. We have taken off our rose colored glasses, and looked at everything with our eyes wide open. We have identified waste as well as necessity. We have come up with a strategy to work through these difficult days. We will have to go without some things we have been accustomed to, and fore go eating out, movies, and such. In exchange, we have gained a new teamwork mentality that is good for our marriage as well as our finances. We know what we can do without and what we would like to work toward for the future. We have lost our naive security, but we have gained characteristics that will buoy us through hard times and profit us in times of plenty. We know that we need to direct our own future and not leave financial decisions to chance or to others. We have hard work ahead, but we have the tools we need to dig deep and get through the rubble.

newbuzz...More great weather today. We are cleaning our house from top to bottom. It is a slow process as we have not done such a thorough cleaning in many years. I have concluded that going forward, I am going to have a yearly audit/inventory to make sure that the stuff I am keeping and storing away is still necessary. Much of what I have now belongs to the kids, and they do not have a place to store it yet. I still have some of their toys and it would be nice to get rid of them. But, then I realize that the days of grandchildren may not be too far off. After keeping the toys for the last 20 years, it seems silly to donate them now when I may need them again in a couple of years. So, I just keep shuffling boxes around in the name of organization. I am newly committed to going green. I want to leave a much smaller carbon footprint in my future than I have in my past. I am bringing new energy and effort to this old adage: Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without. We must remember that the first two R's: reduce and resue are always preferrable to the last one:recycle.

newbuzz...65 degrees and sunny on November 8th in Minnesota. Now that's something to write about. We had such a cold, gloomy, snowy October that this weather is especially good for the soul. Did I mention that it is Sunday too? Everything is better when the sun is shining. People are outside riding bikes and walking their dogs. It was even warm enough to sit outside in the sunshine for a while. We cooked dinner on the grill, and entertained our grown children. Now that I have gotten used to the quiet of the empty nest, I am fully able to enjoy the visits we do have. No more pining over what used to be. No more feeling misplaced and lost. Now I appreciate the time I have to myself and the times we get together with the kids. I still play the mom card once in a while, and I suspect I always will. But now, more and more often, I am the hostess and friend. These girls have grown into such lovely young women and are so interesting. Their lives have become their own, separate from mine, and it is okay. We have all grown and changed. But we are still connected by our hearts, and by their dad's chocolate cake.

newbuzz...Looking for a job is hard work. Since it is all done online, it can take hours of combing through websites and job boards to find something to apply for. Each site requires a user name and password, so I have a notebook with pages of passwords written down so I can visit the site again. Often, when you find a job to apply for, you are directed to another site that requires another user name and password. Sometimes you find out that a "job" is really an advertisement for a school, or some other service that is for sale. Once you locate an actual job that is interesting, there are some practical questions. "What does it pay?" "Is it too far to drive?" "Do my skills match the posting?" Then, there are many things to attend to with each application; the resume, the cover letter, the email. Finally, it is the waiting that produces the most tension. "Will they call?" "Will I get an interview?" "Will I know what to say?" "What should I wear?" "Will I like them?" "Will they like me?" After five days of this, it is no wonder that I look forward to the weekends. Even though I have not stepped foot in an office, or a workplace, I have been busy nonetheless. I give myself the weekends off. I try not to worry, and to enjoy my "time off" like I did when I was working. And I do. I take the dogs for walks, visit with family and friends,and catch up on my reading. I have noticed over the last five weeks of being home that I am not in such a rush anymore. With no money to spend, I am doing more activities and seeing more people. I appreciate the small things and really enjoy being home. Though this time is difficult financially, I am starting to see it as a blessing too. Now I have the opportunity to reflect on my life without being in constant motion. I feel more tranquil, and I appreciate myself for what I have accomplished to this point. I will get back to working on the job hunt on Monday, but for the rest of the weekend, I am going to enjoy the sunshine.

newbuzz...My second interview for the same position went well. But, I did learn that I got the interview due to a glitch in the system. The job was not actually re-posted; it was still open from the original posting. So, I crashed the system and had my second screening interview. My interviewer was very nice about the error, and did give me a complete interview. I feel that I did better the second time around, and will take this experience into my next opportunity. The position today may not be available to me, but there may be another one with this company in the future, and I have certainly made a name for myself, "persistent"(system crasher). In my second interview, I felt that I was more professional, more concise, and more inquisitive. I may have been able to do this because I had a measure of comfort, knowing what may be asked. But, upon review and introspection, I realize that I can bring this same level of comfort to every interview if I take the time to think carefully about the job from the employer's perspective. This way, I can not only highlight my skills and abilities as they will benefit the employer, but I can also form my own questions based on information that I did not get from the posted job description or the company website. What I learned today firsthand, is that I will be more effective in an interview if I dispense with the memorized examples and anecdotes of excellence in my past work performance. I will stop trying to guess what questions may be asked, and instead, learn as much about the company and the open position as possible. Once I do this, I will be more relaxed, and able to think of my own questions for the interviewer. As I go back to the drawing board, I realize that I am more prepared for success in my next interview.

newbuzz...I have been officially unemployed since October 2, 2009. I had my first interview with a new company on October 5th. The interview went well, and I thought I would be called for a second interview. Instead, I received my "Dear Jane" letter. Then on Monday, the same job was posted again on a popular job website; so I applied for it again. I figured the candidate they had in mind didn't work out and this was my chance to reconnect with the company. On Tuesday, I received a call from the company recruiter to come in for an interview. I will be meeting with a Human Resources representative tomorrow morning. I hope it goes better this time around. I have prepared more carefully, and plan to focus on different aspects of my abilities for this interview. It is surprising how much must accomplished and learned in the process of searching for a job . I wonder if there is any job out there that is half as challenging as getting hired.

newbuzz...Drastic times call for drastic measures. My wireless internet modem konked out midway through my internet chore list. Therefore, I am sitting at the Goodbye Blue Mondays cafe, using the free wifi and sipping a dangerously caffeinated drink. Normally, people my age refrain from getting all jazzed up after 7pm on a weeknight. But I must complete these tasks and I cannot use the free wireless without a purchase. Anyway, I really cannot sit in a coffee shop and smell the coffee without ordering something with a snazzy name and a come hither aroma. Once it is beside me on the table, I tell myself that I will only take a few sips and leave the rest so my seven hours of sleep will not be interrupted by the glassy eyed energy of a recent coffee buzz. However, I will only be fooling myself, the same way I always think my cat will not jump on the counter when I am away from home. It is a lie. The temptation is too great. Just like my cat will jump up on the counter, I too will succumb, and I will drink the whole thing. I will be up late tonight and I will regret it tomorrow. But the fact remains, I need the internet and the loss of sleep is an undesirable by-product that cannot be avoided.

newbuzz...The only safety net that cannot be snatched away is faith. In these times of uncertainty, there are very few constants. I have lost my job at the exact same time that my husband has been laid off from his job. We will have unemployment benefits for a time, but they do not provide nearly enough to pay all of the bills. As my substantial student loan balances become due and payable, I am questioning the wisdom of the degree I worked so hard to earn. But then, I must remember the wide-eyed faith and childlike excitement I experienced as I signed up for classes in anticipation of the education I would receive and the benefits it would bestow on my life.
Six years ago, I embarked on my quest for a Bachelor's degree, late in life when most people were beginning to prepare for retirement. I longed for higher knowledge and what I perceived as the prestige that comes with a college education. I willingly signed up for classes at an expensive private college and jumped in with both feet. I was worried about paying for it, but I quelled my fear with faith; faith that God would provide me with the resources to to pay for school, the intelligence and energy to succeed in my classes, and faith that it would pay off in the end. Now I have graduated in the worst economy in the last fifty years. I have no job, an inflated mortgage, and a student loan payment that I cannot afford.
While I regretfully admit that I have lost faith in my government to keep me safe, I have begun to dig deeper into the real essence of my faith. Though my emotional state runs parallel to a speeding roller coaster, up with worry, down with fatigue, I am finding small breaks in the extremes. During these quiet times, when I am too tired to worry and not yet able to rest, I recognize my vulnerability in a way that calms my spirit. I realize in these times, that I must live in the moment and I cannot control the world around me. If I had a steady job that paid enough to cover the bills, I would still not have the safety I long for, only an illusion of safety. The wolf would still be at my door, poised to deliver an illness, an injury, a death, or any loss within a moment's notice, and I would be powerless to defend myself.
Faith is not about the things I have or the things I need to get. Faith is about being quiet and living each moment as God gives it to me. Faith is knowing that I have a place in the universe and that my place is here and now. There will come a time when my place is somewhere else, and when that time comes, none of the turmoil of today will matter.
My moments of peace come sparingly, and they are fleeting, but I have faith in the God of the Bible who loves me, and I know that He will guard my faith, and this faith will keep me safe.

newbuzz...I painted my finger nails hot pink because the color makes me happy. The recent 90 degree weather prompted me to paint my toenails so I can wear sandals to work. I was planning on going out for a pedicure, but changed my mind when I saw the $35.00 price tag. Instead, I opted for some foot scrub, lotion, and a bottle of nail polish for a grand total under $10.00. I went home and soaked and scrubbed my feet and applied the hot pink nail polish. With my feet looking so lovely, there really was no reason to leave my fingernails colorless. Now that my fingernails match my toenails, I feel quite snappy and ladylike. I remember my grandpa saying that girls who wear nail polish are girls who never do dishes. I am not sure if that was a compliment or a put down, but while I have hot pink fingernails, I feel pampered and rich. I leave the dishes alone and go for a walk instead.

newbuzz...If you have bifocals, you should wear them all the time. This is a lesson I learned recently after making an embarrassing graduation gaffe. It is high school graduation season in my community and families customarily have large parties and open houses to celebrate. Friends and family are expected to bring a gift and it is usually money placed in a card. Last year I bought a pack of several cards and used a couple of them. I knew they were left over and pulled them out again for this year. I had a party to attend and quickly signed a card, tucked a bill into the envelope, sealed it, and gave it to the graduate. The next week, I had another party to attend. This time, I had my glasses on as I picked up the card for my signature and the money. Wow, what a surprise I got as I read the front of the card! Not only did it say, "Congratulations Graduate," but there in each of the colorful balloons, it also said, "2008". I did not have time to get another card, and quickly made the choice to use the outdated card again. I explained that I have gone green and this is a way to reduce my carbon footprint, but I threw out the rest of the cards.

newbuzz....It turns out that I am a big fan of the color yellow and that surprises me. Just a few short years ago, my entire house was painted eggshell. I had neutral furniture and draperies as well. This blank slate left much room for my imagination to fill with plants, pets, pictures of loved ones, books, collections of things, and other stuff. During the years I spent raising the kids, I also nearly raised the roof of our house with all the fun stuff I found on sale. It was great, I loved having the kids around with all their things and seeing my own identity all around me as well. Then, as the kids began to leave the nest, so too did my desire to have all the stuff. My tolerance for messes and unfinished projects flew the coop as well. In one fell swoop, I changed my decor from circa Aunt Bea (Mayberry) to Martha Stewart. Out went the teacup collection, the mismatched knick knacks, the fish aquariums, and the many potted plants. Now the walls are painted bold, on-trend colors and each room has a theme. Everything has a place and everything is in its place. If it doesn't match I don't need it. If I don't need it, I don't buy it. I like the new orderliness. It makes me feel in control and relaxed. I also like my new "study", formerly known as my daughter's bedroom. The walls are bright, egg-yolk yellow. It is a bright room full of energy. Now I carry my identity with me, and have less need for external validation. I think this is the wisdom that comes with middle age. I am okay with living a simpler life. Having less stuff and avoiding the purchase of new stuff is leaving me with more resources for self exploration and growth. I do occasionally lapse back into my old self; the one who wants to have cool stuff. And I do occasionally buy unneeded stuff. But when I look around and start to see more of Aunt Bea than Martha Stewart, I know it is time to reign it in and have a garage sale.

newbuzz...Everyone is talking about the rain. "I love it." " I hate it." "We need it." "At least it is not snowing." I have made each of these statements more than once today. I love the rain because of the rhythmic patter it makes on the roof and the way the sound relaxes me. I hate the rain because it gets my hair and make up wet, leaving me feeling like a soggy noodle. We need the rain now so we can feast on fresh garden vegetables later in August. It could be snowing and I am very glad that it is not. Now that it is evening and the sun has set, I can appreciate the rain and the reprieve from the lively chores of summer. For tonight, I did not have to pull weeds, take the dogs for a walk, fill the bird feeders, move the sprinkler around or even go to the grocery store. In fact, the rain gave me an excuse to sit quietly and work on my cross stitch. Not long ago I was wishing for nice weather to do all my outdoor activities. But I am a complicated human being, and like many before me, I desire what I do not have. Doing nothing is a treat when there is something to be done. Doing something is a treat when there is nothing to do. I could have done nothing on a sunny day, but it feels better when I have the rain on my side.

newbuzz...The T.V. anchor had his Malti-Poo puppy on the news desk for all to admire. Her name was Belle and she was one and a half pounds of white fluff with black eyes and a black nose. The female anchor was apologizing for the baby-talk that spilled from her mouth in the presence of the puppy. So why does the presence of babies elicit baby-talk from most people? I think it is because deep down we all remember and long for the simpler days of our own youth when we wore our emotions on our sleeves and nothing had to make sense. Adults burst into baby-talk as a joyful response to innocence and a desire to connect with it. As we babble and coo, we become more vulnerable to match the status of the baby we adore. As we become vulnerable, the baby gains status. As the baby gains status, we become equal to the baby. It is a perfect combination.
Baby + Babbling Adult = Two joyful souls

newbuzz...We must all do our part to save the earth. In that spirit, I have dedicated my patio pots to vegetables this year as well as flowers. I have tomatoes, green bell peppers, lettuce, radishes, and herbs. In one large, aromatic pot I have placed flat leaf parsley, curled parsley, oregano, basil, and chives. It is already producing tasty greenery to spice my spaghetti sauce. We are also enjoying fresh lettuce salads. The radishes will be ready soon and I will continue to replant them as needed throughout the season. I am looking forward to later in the summer when I will be able to harvest fresh tomatoes and bell peppers for a 100% homegrown spaghetti sauce. By that time, the flower pots will be drawing flocks of hummingbirds and butterflies. Supper on the patio is sure to be an organic extravaganza.

newbuzz...I am watching a lovely old Disney move...The Biscuit Eater. It is a heartwarming story about a couple of boys and the bird dog they are attempting to show. The boys have blind faith in their unproven dog and his ability to win the Grand National Championship. Their only obstacle is the stubborn father of one of them who does not want them to try. He has cast the dog aside, and the boys have trained the dog on their own. On and on the story goes, and you can guess the ending. What I am finding particularly valuable is the poignant lesson in trust and faith. The boys believe in the dog's ability, and as a result, the dog lives up to their expectations. I know there have been many instances in my life where I have lived up to the expectations of others, whether good or bad. I have also lived up or down to my own expectations. People are much like faithful dogs in that respect. Both want to please others. Upon reflection, I have decided to put my expectations of myself and others on a very long leash that can be undone at a moment's notice.

newbuzz...People in my community are very anxious about the economy. Many folks have lost their jobs, and many others are worried about losing their jobs. I am not immune to the negativity but I try to keep it in perspective. We are still in America after all. We still have more opportunity here than most people in the world will enjoy. But, with the blatant encouragement of the mass media, many Americans have lived beyond their means for the last couple of decades. Now it is time to tighten our money belts. Some people will be forced to downsize and change their lifestyles drastically. This will be difficult but not impossible. With fewer things to keep track of, Americans will be able to focus more on our people and our environment. As we look around at others who are in need, we will learn to share. I believe that now is the time to take stock of our own positions in life and to make changes in our habits. We do not gain anything with worry, and we cannot be complacent. We must remember that we are the government and we must be involved in the decisions of our politicians and lawmakers.

newbuzz...I am on vacation this week and it is Thursday already. Monday was an actual holiday, (Memorial Day), and a scheduled day off work, so technically, this is my third day of vacation. It has taken until today for me to regain my calm approach to life. While under the stress of the job, I tend to be more reactionary than I would like. Now after three sunny, lazy, nothing-filled days, I am feeling more optimistic than I have in a long time. My most notable accomplishment of the week to date is that I have finally cleaned my storage closet. (Big pat on the back to me.) It was a job I have been putting off and now that it is done, I feel great. I have also walked on the treadmill for an hour each day. This has been invigorating. I have listened to a noisy cardinal outside my window for more hours than I can count. This kind of peaceful daydreaming is just what the doctor ordered and more effective than talking about my worries to get them in perspective. I feel rested, I feel strong, and I feel like I am ready to handle whatever comes next.

newbuzz...I have graduated as a Bachelor of Science, Communication Studies. It took six years of weekend college, lots of energy, and lots of money. I have it, I did it, I am a college graduate, and I am thankful for it. By coincidence, on the day of my very last class, I found out that I will be losing my job. My department is being relocated out of state. I have loved this job enough to stay with it for 12 years, and I have hated it enough to seek a college degree with the hope of doing something else. So now, I will have to leave this job and find something new. It is very unsettling. My feelings are on a roller coaster and go from excitement, to sadness to fear, and back again. There is nothing to do but go forward. I have to trust that God will guide me through this next phase with the same great care that he has from the first day of my life. I must not let my fears and worries invade my happiness and my ability to live. My life has given me many experiences to guide my actions and my education has given me a foundation from which to build my dreams.

newbuzz...Everything is relative. Not long ago on my 40th birthday, I was reminded that 40 is the new 20, and that seems plausible to me. Actually, 50 is the new 30. So it stands to reason that Mother Nature would have some weather rules of her own to keep up with current trends. Yesterday it was 97 degrees outside and today it is 92. That is pretty hot for a Minnesota May 20th. I would prefer 85 degrees and sunny, with a slight breeze and some free time. But this is good too, though it is unexpected. On Sunday, we covered the small tomato plants in their pots on the patio to protect them from a late frost. Today I can almost hear them growing in the heat. We can only speculate on what this means for the rest of the season. But first, we have to agree on what season we are actually in. The calendar says spring, but the thermometer says summer. I guess we just have to leave it up to Mother Nature, and perhaps she is thinking that Spring is the new Summer.

newbuzz...The marquee on our local tavern advertises a comedian this weekend. Interesting. Our area in the upper Midwest is one of the last areas that commonly books live bands. I guess they bring in the drinkers. I love live bands but I don't drink much and I have a hard time parting with my money in these hard economic times. But now that I think about it, I would love to get out and laugh a little. I might even be willing to buy dinner and a drink while I'm there. Lately, I have been noticing more comedians advertised in small, local venues. Just what the doctor ordered to make us forget about our troubles and fill up the cash register. Capitalists are creative thinkers. I believe the economy will recover, but it will be different.

newbuzz...Is it a good idea to give an answer in a job interview when you are asked, "What is your greatest weakness?" My gut reaction is, "no." It seems like any answer you give is likely to plant a bias in the mind of someone who could have power over you in the workplace. But it is not good to avoid the question or brush it off either. Then you risk coming off as self unaware, or worse, dismissive. I think the answer to that question is, "Yes, you should reply." But your answer should be very thoughtful and not overly self effacing. I do not believe I could give a great answer to that question off the cuff, so I am going to spend some time mulling it over to see if I can come up with something that will further my cause in an interview. After all, the point is to get the job, not to confess your sins. My daughter suggested finding a specific example of a difficulty I have had at work and then telling how I found a solution to the problem. This way, I will be alluding to self awareness and problem solving but not dwelling on personal shortcomings. I like this approach and I am going to think about it overnight so I will have a great answer the next time an employer or potential employer asks me, "What is your greatest weakness?"

newbuzz...My cats keep sneaking out of the house. They want to get out in the sunshine and chew on the new grass coming up. "But you are declawed!" I scream, "You can't go outside, you will be helpless, and vulnerable to attack". But they don't listen. They just want outside. They remember when they did have claws and how the breeze felt on their fur. They remember stalking birds and catching butterflies. They are fully focused on the good things they know about nature. They do not wonder if a big dog is hiding behind the bushes. They are not afraid of meeting a strange cat in the alley. In their minds they can still scale trees and scratch up the dirt. So they sneak outside and bask in the sunshine. They bat at bugs and roll in the dirt. They meow when they see me and rub against my legs. "Thank you for letting us out," they say, "thank you for giving us our freedom, and thank you for keeping us safe". "My pleasure", I think to myself and I make a note to thank God for my life and to think more like a cat.

newbuzz...I feel guilty because I stayed home from work today. I am sick and I just wanted to rest. I did not get dressed, I did not go anywhere. I just stayed in my pajamas and either slept or watched television. Now that the day is done, I feel a little better and I do not feel any worse. Then why do I feel so guilty? The sore throat and aches began a week ago on Monday. This was actually the tenth day of my illness. If this is a virus, I should be on the mend, but I am still coughing, my ears hurt, and I am tired. I have also earned 55 hours of vacation and 20 hours of personal paid leave time since January 1st. Taking off one day when I am sick should be a good thing. But it feels bad. It feels like I am breaking the rules. It feels like I am being dishonest or untrustworthy somehow. This is the work world that I live in. This is the bearish economy telling me to keep working no matter what. I should be thankful to have a job when so many others are unemployed. This is what I call the "worry" propaganda and it is amplified when we hear stories on the news like the recent case of a woman who was fired from her job because she was on Facebook when she was home sick. The truth is, I am thankful to have a job. But I am also thankful to have paid sick leave and personal paid leave. And I am smart enough to know that in business, you must use it or you will lose it. So I am going to fight the guilt, give in to the bug, and feel blessed to be wearing some really comfy pajamas.

newbuzz...I love spaghetti. When we have spaghetti for dinner I know that I will not stop eating until I am full. And I mean very full. No room left. There is just something about the combination of Italian tomato sauce with meat over steaming noodles that cannot be beat. The meat is delicious and the fat in it is certainly negated by the vegetable make up of the tomato sauce. And the empty calories in the spaghetti noodles are rendered harmless because of the little chunks of tomato in the sauce. I mean, when you really get down to it, what is spaghetti anyway? Just a lot of vegetables with a little other stuff. And vegetables are very healthy. You need five a day. I think the doctor would want me to have seconds. I have to eat until I am full so I know that I am getting all my vegetables in. I love spaghetti, and that is a good thing. Because I want to be healthy, and I always follow the rules.

newbuzz...As I prepare to graduate in May with my B.S. in Communication Studies I am full of joy, excitement, and fear. I am looking forward to having more free time but I am also afraid of more free time. I am excited about trying new things at the same time that I am afraid to to venture outside of my old, familiar territory. These are the opposite poles people visit when they are nearing the end of one era and beginning another. I am no different. I want to grow but fear that I will shrink. What I must do is march forward without looking back except to to congratulate myself on work well done. I will proceed through my future the same way I earned my undergraduate degree, one day at a time.

newbuzz...The fallout of divorce is far reaching and often unrecognized. It touches the spouses, the children, the friends, the rest of the family, the school, the church, and even the pets. No one is left without a lasting memory of the unraveling of the marriage. In many cases, the divorce is for the good of the family. But in the worst cases it is merely a continuation of the strife that developed in the relationship between the spouses in the first place. I have seen my share of troubled marriages, some that ended in divorce and others that were maintained. What I know for sure is that whether spouses decide to stay in the marriage, or leave the marriage, they will have to work hard at being happy. Life on earth is hard; it takes some effort to be happy whether married, divorced, widowed, or single. If you simply believe that walking out of a marriage will make your life better, you will be sorely disappointed. Until you do the hard work of changing that within yourself which allowed you to participate in an unhappy relationship, it will reappear again and again. After many years of marriage, I have learned that when I look at my husband with dissatisfaction, it is a good indicator that I am feeling a void in myself. Much like when I get a haircut to feel better, but what I really need is to lose ten pounds so my clothes will fit me. When I am in this frame of mind, my energy is best spent filling the void inside myself in a meaningful way. Then when I feel powerful and whole, I am apt to be more tolerant of his foibles and more satisfied with the marriage. I believe that divorce can be good for individuals, but only when they work to learn and understand how they are interacting with others. Since everyone will be touched by the drama of divorce, it is important for both spouses to find peace and happiness within themselves before they begin new relationships.

newbuzz...I had a really good burger and a beer at the local bar. This is precisely the experience that leaves me cold when contemplating vegetarianism. Though I love vegetables, grains, and legumes, I would really miss the smell and taste of cooked meat. However, I can only enjoy the meat because it comes to me directly from the grocery store. If I had to go hunting, kill an animal and then butcher it, I would be much more amenable to vegetarianism. I have never had to do any of those things, and they are very distasteful to me. But I have never really been hungry either. So I suspect that as long as it is easy to get, I will continue to eat meat. And if I ever get really hungry, I will go hunting.

newbuzz...My husband has been laid off work for about six weeks. Now he brings me coffee every morning and has supper ready every evening when I get home from work. He is doing the dishes, the laundry and cleaning the house. He is doing yard work and stripping down wallpaper and painting our bedroom. I think this is great. I do not miss doing any of this myself. Now I can spend my time outside of work on homework and hobbies. I am appreciative of his efforts, but not thankful. I am keeping it clear to myself and others that he is not "helping me", or "doing my job". He is doing his own work and picking up my share while he is unemployed. I think it is fair. After all, he is still getting a paycheck, and he has the luxury of doing his chores without two kids in tow.

newbuzz...For the first time in their lives, many Americans are out of work. There are more displaced workers than there are job opportunities. As a result, people are becoming more desperate and more competitive for the jobs that are available. One solution to this is a new phenomenon called networking. We hear about it in bestsellers, newspapers, magazines, on television, in the office, and on college campuses. It is touted as the skill that will help you find a job and secure your rise above the masses. I think in their vigor to embrace this idea, many people are missing the point.
The way I see it, networking has been around since time began. The only thing new about networking today is the capitalist spin applied to it. To me, networking is connecting with the people you know, who also know you and have some context into your character. Your network might include your earliest school chums, your church friends, members of your kids' PTA, members of local groups and clubs, business associates and friends and family. With this kind of network you are bound to find help and support in your darkest hours, including the loss of your job. The context of caring and concern is missing from the new networking. The virtue of giving to others is lost. Now people are instructed to collect contacts and business cards so that if disaster strikes they will have a network of support.
I think a person with a full network is one who has lived a rich life and taken care to tend existing relationships as well as make new friends and contacts. In my estimation, pursuing contacts with the single minded notion of how they will help you in the future is not an authentic way to live. I think it is better to enjoy the people you meet because of the exchange you share today. This kind of warm, authentic connection with people will enrich your life and your career and will stand the test of time.

newbuzz..Now that it is spring, I have run out of reasons to skip my daily walks at work. No more complaining with coffee in the break room. No more lamenting my spreading thighs. No more "if only it were warm", or "I wish it were nice out". Starting today, the rubber hits the road, literally. I have a perfect plan to get my daily exercise. My walking shoes are under my desk and my leggings are stashed nearby for those windy days that threaten to launch my skirt. Twice daily for fifteen minutes I will power walk around the parking lot while my body absorbs sunshine and vitamin D. I am certain that I will become healthier and happier in no time. I have cast off the notion that only 60 minutes of aerobics will do. I will not berate myself for having a simple workout. I will walk with a spring in my step and a song in my heart. Spring is here. I may not be The Biggest Loser (NBC 2009), but hey, I'm not the biggest loser either.

newbuzz...I was reading a friend's Facebook posting for today. It was about dreams and how they work for us by directing our energy towards a goal that is compatible with our talents and gifts. I have always felt that I am called for a larger purpose but could never determine what it is. Now I know that my purpose is manifest in everything that I do. I have been looking for a well defined cause or occupation, but I realize today that fulfilling my purpose is not dependent upon a particular job, charity, or relationship. Rather, it is the state of my heart and mind that defines my purpose. My dream is to help others in both tangible and intangible ways. My gift is that I am nurturing, kind, and loyal by nature. My talent is to remain upbeat and positive in all situations. My calling is to touch people with joy and encouragement. This is compatible with my dream.

newbuzz...Tomorrow is tax day and I don't like it. I have filed my federal and state income taxes, received a federal refund and turned it over to my state treasury. So I am in the clear, but millions of other tax payers will hustle and bustle to get their forms turned in before midnight. I don't know how to fix this mess, but there must be a better way for Americans to pay their fair share towards the infrastructure of our country. The problem is that tax collection is big business in America. Lots of people are employed in this industry. It is the same as so many industries in America today. If we simplify it and make it more efficient, people lose their jobs. I think the best way to go green and fix the economy at the same time is to take the pork out of every industry. Then, with all the displaced workers, we could begin to rebuild factories at the local level so items don't have to be packaged so wastefully for shipment from overseas.

newbuzz...I had the opportunity to make playdough cookies with a three year old boy and a five year old girl. I have not enjoyed playdough since my own girls were young, almost ten years ago. It hasn't changed much. The colors are brighter and the gadgets are different. But basically, it's the same old thing. Roll it, pinch it, squash it, cut it, pretend to eat it, and start all over. The smell of playdough evokes a warm fuzzy feeling at the same time it brings out the serious artist in me. I spent many happy hours in my own youth sculpting various replicas of household items, bakery goods, animals, and people faces. My all time favorite is the spaghetti pumper where you can make piles of strings which can then be arranged, cut, or smashed. Playdough play hasn't changed much over the last 40 years. The play value of playdough has survived video games, cell phones, computers, Facebook, the iPod, and adulthood. For this, I am thankful.

newbuzz...This sunny Easter morning in the upper mid-west brings hope on many levels. I am up early and can hear the church bells ringing in my small town. There are sure to be little girls in lacy dresses and little boys with clip on ties in church pews everywhere. For today, families will get together to collect colored eggs and to eat ham and lemon pie. Like Christmas, Easter has become a seasonal marker as well as a Christian holiday. You do not have to be Christian to celebrate it. In fact, Americans will celebrate the arrival of Easter whether they know it or not. Now that Easter has come, retailers can begin to sell summer. Everything from houses to lawn furniture to swimming suits to indoor and outdoor home decor will be advertised to American families en mass. While Christians mark this day with hope for an everlasting life, retailers and merchants across the country are hoping for recovery from the great recession of the late 2000's. I hope for peace, prosperity, long life, health, happiness and everlasting glory. If I behave as though all of these things are possible, I am likely to find them.

newbuzz...I have one small clump of yellow crocus' blooming in my garden. I usually have yellow, white, and purple crocus' along with a mini field of blue scilla blooming on Easter Sunday. Many years the flowers have bloomed right through the snow cover. Not this year. It is like all the vegetation went on strike and only the yellow crocus' dared to cross the picket line. I wonder what it is they are waiting for. There was plenty of snow cover this winter to protect the bulbs. The top layer of frost is gone. We have had sun and precipitation. Easter is late this year, but still no blooms except for my faithful yellow crocus'. Not a hint of a hosta or the tip of a tulip can be seen. But the yellow crocus' give me hope. I think Mother Nature is playing a little trick on me. Easter morning will find me looking for hidden flowers instead of colored eggs.

newbuzz...I was listening to a young college student talk about her unpaid internship. She wanted to learn new things but did not want to do tasks that were too difficult, or outside of her ability. At the same time, she was frustrated because her employer expected her to do menial tasks that she felt were beneath her ability. She was bored. Did she really say that? As an older adult with many years experience in the corporate world, I know that we all pay our dues, no matter how smart and well equipped we are to tackle the world. I am hoping that this bright girl learns sooner rather than later that she will gain more ground with humble confidence than she will with brash arrogance. At the same time she was demanding easy work she was affronted when given basic administrative tasks. Who should be doing the mindless, repetitive work that makes the office run smoothly? Why not take advantage of the intern in exchange for giving her a real life work experience that can be added to her resume? After all, much of what happens at work is boring. By the time you get into the really interesting stuff, you've paid your dues. And I have found that the cost of dues is directly correlated with your attitude.

newbuzz...I was feeling restless today because it is not winter anymore, but not yet warm enough for outdoor activity. As I started to settle on cleaning the house, I came upon some yarn that was leftover from a winter project. If it were winter, I would gladly make mittens, or hats and scarves. But making those things now just feels wrong. Instead, I began to wonder about what to do with yarn in the spring. It came to me easily as I gazed at the four complimentary colors. I will do what every good granny has done with leftover winter yarn. I will make a granny-square afghan for my daughter. I have gotten two squares done already and they are lovely. This afghan will be just the right weight and weave for cool summer nights. And for added fun, I will not throw away the tidbits of yarn that I clip as I stitch the squares together. I will toss them outside for my nesting bird friends to see what kind of afghans they make for their little ones.

newbuzz...It is cold, gray, and snowy outside. This should not surprise me on April 1 in Minnesota. I guess it doesn't really surprise me as much as it disappoints me. I was just thawing out my lazy bones and beginning to feel like taking walks and doing some strength training. The sight of snow on the ground this morning instantly brought me back to my late-winter blahs. Poor me, now I have to wear my winter jacket and gloves. My shoes might get wet. My nose will be cold. I will see my breath as I walk. Woe is me. I want sunshine and a buff body. But, for now I will have to be content with what I have.

newbuzz...I am compelled to feed the animals. All the animals. Though I live in town, we have a veritable wildlife preserve at my house. If you are a stray cat, a wandering duck, a mourning dove, a mischievous squirrel, a hummingbird, or simply a hungry yard bird, come on over. You will be fed and admired to the utmost of my ability. I am a nurturer and a nature lover. It is my instinct to take care of the ones I love. It is not enough for me to feed the cats and dogs of our home, I must also feed the animals that roam free in my neighborhood. It has been suggested that I let these critters fend for themselves and they will be fine without me. But I don't do it for them. I do it for me. It makes me happy to feed them. These are quasi-wild animals. They are townies. They don't really have to fend for themselves, because if I didn't feed them, someone else would. But we know each other and we like each other. We have an understanding. They are my wildlife and I am their meal ticket.

newbuzz...My dog has learned to shake hands. Specifically, he has shaken my hand three times. He did this after no less than four years of training and an eight pound bag of cat food, given one kibble at a time. I don't know why he fights me on this. It is clear that he can hear me talking. He can see me holding out my hand. I think he knows what I want. Yet, he sits there time after time with a blank look on his face. At one point, he began to whine every time I gave the command to "shake". I think he was trying to ask why, but my daughter thinks he was saying "I don't want to". In any case, just as I was ready to give up again, he threw his paw in the air and shook my hand. It was like a mercy shake; I think he really felt sorry for me. We all clapped and cheered because it was so exciting. He repeated the same scenario three times yesterday -three shakes in all. It occurs to me that only one of us is stressing out about this. He has the upper hand and I realize that he is much smarter than he looks.

newbuzz...I have finished my last final exam. At 46 years of age, I have completed work for my Baccalaureate degree. I am now a Bachelor of Science in Communications Studies, Oral Concentration. It has taken six years to accomplish this goal. I have continued to work 40 hours per week and watched my daughters grow and leave the nest. What began as a mid life crisis has ended in the beautiful rebirth of my spirit as well as the enlightenment of my mind. I am more confident, more poised and more prepared to face any challenge that comes my way. I am more interesting and more interested in my own life and the lives of those around me. People ask me what I plan to do with my degree. Simple; I will live my life with greater understanding and purpose. I will lead and influence others wherever I find the need. I will advocate for higher education for every individual. I am different because of my education. I have become more of myself, I feel it in my bones.

newbuzz...It is Friday and I am tired. I have worked hard all week. All the worrying I did about things that might happen and things that might not happen has given way to time. Some of those things did happen and some of them did not. In the end, the worrying was worse than the happening. But this is what makes us human, this "nexting" that we do. No other species has this unique ability to think and plan beyond right now. Women in the Western world are especially adept at this skill, and I rank right up with the best of them. Thinking ahead and planning what comes next has served me well in many cases. However, after a week like this one, I realize that it can be carried to extreme. Multitasking can quickly give way to worrying. Worrying is wasted energy. To waste not is to want not. Therefore, I am declaring this weekend a worry free zone. Whatever happens next is alright with me.

newbuzz...There is a young woman at work who is expecting her first baby on April 10th. She is delightfully big bellied and full of optimism. We love to give her advice and tell her our own baby stories. We smile and chuckle as we hear about her aches and pains. We remind her to get up and walk around to avoid putting her back out. We caution her to rest and take plenty of naps now as she won't be sleeping much after the baby comes. Everyone joins in with his or her two cents worth of knowledge whether or not they have children of their own. There is nothing so wonderful at work as having an expectant mother in the midst. Her condition brings out the nurturing in people and the desire to protect her builds a community spirit of cooperation. We will miss her when she is on maternity leave, but we will have so much more advice to give when she comes back to work with a little bundle of joy at home.

newbuzz...I just paid all my bills, which feels good, but I hate to see my checkbook balance dwindle. I am accustomed to having my goods and services. It almost seems like I am wasting money as I pay for my electricity, telephone, internet, gas, house, car, etc., etc. I am lucky that I have an income that allows me to pay the bills, and I realize that I am one of the Americans that needs to do an attitude check. The reason I go to work every day is so that I can have all of my daily needs (and wants) met. I should feel happy and excited to pay for the items I have already consumed. Somehow during the last 20 years or so, I have developed an idea that it is good to buy new stuff, and not so good to pay for the old stuff I already have. I think I would feel more thankful and less entitled if I were required to prepay for the things I want and need. I am not ready to go that far, but I will give thanks tonight that I am able to pay my bills and go to sleep.

newbuzz...This was a Sunday like any other until I had the chance to reconnect with an old friend. What a joy to chat again and think about times gone by. We worked together and spent many hours on the same projects, targeting the same goals. Oh, how I have missed my friend at work these past few years. But I have grown and so has my friend. We both made changes that have been good. I am beginning to understand that change is constant, and so are good friends.

newbuzz...The first day of spring is welcome in Minnesota. We don't care that it is raining. We don't care that it is only 33 degrees. The fact that it is no longer winter is good enough for us. We will be sporting sandals and shorts before the last of the snow is melted from the sidewalk. Excitement is in the air as we begin dusting off our rollerblades and pumping up our bike tires. Soon garage sale signs will pop up on every corner and ads for free kittens will appear in every newspaper. We have made it through the deep freeze and summer is sure to follow. Yay spring!

newbuzz...Today my husband accompanied me and my two dogs on our walk. It was fun, but it is clear that he does not yet know the dog-walk code that has evolved with me and the dogs over the last two years. For instance, he was thinking that the reason we go for a walk is to walk. Wrong. The dogs simply want to sniff and pee. I simply want to be outdoors to feel the sun in my face, the breeze in my hair, and to hear the sounds of my community. He was a little frustrated at our slow moving pace, but eventually realized that we would make better time by giving in to the dogs. If we allow them a few good sniffs around a tree, they will give us a fairly long stretch of straight line walking. I think we would do well to apply this theory to our interactions with people as well. Sometimes a little diversion serves the end goal better than single minded pursuit . I'm looking forward to our next walk with the dogs.

newbuzz...It is St. Patrick's Day, and everyone is Irish. I wore green today. Lots of people at work wore green today. All day long I heard hushed plans of meeting at various pubs and bars to drink green beer. Is that was this day is all about? I have to shamefully admit that I do not know St. Patrick's claim to fame, though I think it has something to do with the great potato famine. I know it is a day for parades, bagpipes, and Irish pride. No one seems to mind that it is an ethnic/religious holiday. No griping about foreigners. No wishing "they" would go home. This is one ethnic holiday that is fun for all ages and good for local businesses. I suppose there was a time when this may not have been so. I look forward to more ethnic holidays that bring people together instead of bringing out the worst in some folks. For now, I'm going to enjoy the fun, have a beer, and steer clear of leprechauns.

newbuzz...What a difference a day can make. Today was a sunny Sunday. The sidewalks were wet but mostly clear of ice and snow. There were people everywhere out walking their dogs, and pushing strollers. The squirrels had a little more flicker in their tails and the birds were chirping louder than usual. Though yesterday was a good day, today was even better because the sunshine was so warm and the breeze was a little lighter. I brought a jacket outside with me, but never put it on. It was straight sweatshirt weather, and in a Minnesota March, that is a wonderful thing. Now I can believe that spring is just around the corner.

newbuzz...Friday morning we woke to find that our cat had vomitted on the bed. We found her downstairs on the dog bed in front of the heat vent. This is very unusual because she is a timid cat and usually skitters away from the dogs or any foot traffic. Though we all clunked around looking at her and wondering what was wrong, she just lay there flat out with her head down. She had to be ill to behave like that. I imagined the worst...a toy mouse lodged in her gut, a fish bone stuck in her throat, feline leukemia, diabetes, a urinary tract infection. We promptly took her to the vet and she was a little dehydrated. After $200.00 worth of tests, we found out what was wrong with her: nothing. She's home, she's fine. She is sitting on the dog bed, unblinking. We thought her strange behavior indicated a serious illness, but it turns out she just finally found her voice. After six years of bashful manipulation, she is now exerting her full feline force of will. Look out dogs!

newbuzz..Friday the 13th can strike fear in the heart of the strongest warrior, but only if you're superstitious. Not me, I won't give in to the fear. Anyway, today is my daughter's birthday so I have only happy vibes in my world. We had a lovely dinner and cake with the grandparents complete with good conversation and strong coffee. It occurs to me that I choose happiness on a regular basis and that is why my life is working.

newbuzz...Why is there so much Easter Candy? I just threw out the Christmas candy last week, and I think if I looked hard enough, I could even find some Halloween candy around here. Why do they make so many kinds of candy, and why do I buy it? Sometimes we eat the candy and sometimes it just sits in the candy dish until the holiday is over. Then we toss it away to make room for the next bowl of sugar. I like to have it because holiday candy is fun and it makes me feel like a kid. It is cheap and plentiful. Instant emotion every time I reach for a piece - from the store shelf, or the candy dish. I think for the next holiday, I'm going to give up the candy and start reaching for hugs instead.

newbuzz...Are Wednesdays better than Tuesdays? I guess so, if you like wacky better than tacos. I am a big fan of both Taco Tuesday and Wacky Wednesday. But for me Wednesday is best because it is the official Hump Day-as in the top of the Bell Curve. On Wednesday I've reached the halfway point in the work week and it's all down hill from here. It doesn't get any better than this. I've accomplished a lot, with just a little more to go. The glass is halfway... full or empty, you choose. I take mine on the rocks with a twist of lime.

newbuzz...We are having a spring snowfall. It is surprising how quickly the wind blew up. In less than half an hour my lawn went from brown soup to white powder. I'm glad to be indoors as the weather lady is predicting a big drop in the temperature. March is coming in like a lion and we can only hope that it does indeed go out like lamb. Though I am tired of winter and ready for spring, I do have to wonder what we would talk about without the four seasons.

newbuzz...I think Mondays are overrated. Especially the first Monday after the Daylight Savings Time "spring-ahead". I had a lot of anxiety about waking up early, or not waking up at all. Then there was the problem of making sure all the clocks (and watches) had been changed. All this while carrying the typical Monday load of "the weekend was too short and now I have to get down to business" blahs. So, I woke up before the alarm, went through my paces and found myself at work, on time, as usual. Everyone else was there, the work was there. Nothing different than any other day. So I made the coffee and hunkered down to work. The difference between a Monday and any other day are my expectations, and I have come to realize that Mondays are overrated.

newbuzz...Homework got the best of me. I can admit it. But now I'm back in black (ink that is). I aced the psych exam and I can relax for a little while. Relaxing is never so much fun as after a period of great discipline and hard work. It is 40 degrees outside today and the sun has come out a little bit. I have taken my dogs for a walk and even cleaned the kitchen junk drawer. I have the time and energy to buzz in my blog. These are life's simple pleasures, ever more satisfying after a long abstinence. Cheers!

newbuzz...There is nothing like fresh, white snow in the late winter to bring out the kid in me. I suspect there are others who feel this way when the snow starts to fly. Whose tongue can resist lapping a dab of sky candy as it swirls to the ground? I love to watch as the muddy brown landscape disappears under a clean blanket of snow. Being the one who makes the first footprints in the yard or the parking lot is worth all the shoveling and window scraping that follows. I love the snow, even though I hate it.

newbuzz...Our tax returns are finished. We got some back from the IRS and we have to give most of it to the state of MN. Pay the tax preparer, and it's a wash. That's good, right? That means we didn't pay too much in taxes during the year, just our fair share. Then why do I feel cheated? I think it's because somewhere, deep down inside me, the little girl who still believes in Santa Claus was hoping this would be the year I got $5000.00 back. I have no reason to think that I would, I was just hoping. Well, there's always next year.

newbuzz...Today is Fat Tuesday and many people spend the day indulging in bad habits, knowing that Ash Wednesday will bring a halt to them as Christians abstain during lent. I don't know how many people actually give things up for lent anymore. Still, it is good food for thought. I guess we do take our blessings for granted and often abuse our good fortune by being greedy instead of sharing what we have. I indulged freely in unhealthy food today. For lent, I will give up the pizza and chocolate. But I am going to do more. I am going to donate to the food shelf to help those who don't have enough in the first place.

newbuzz...I find peace in the quiet times when I am by myself, doing something I enjoy. The news media often persuades me to feel insecure about what I don't have and what I might lose to the point that I go to bed exhausted with the weight of it all. Just taking a break from "reality" by relaxing with a good book, re-potting a violet, or doing some needlework is the best way I have found to get back to a more realistic frame of mind. Life is not just about the the landmark decisions and events. It is made up of many quiet moments and small accomplishments that move us through time. By filling the small moments with joyful activities, I find peace.

newbuzz...I love Sundays. All rested up from last week and not yet starting a new week. A textbook Type A, I am normally focused and task driven. But on Sunday my focus changes to me and my driving speed shifts into low gear. There is nothing like free time to get the mind wandering. In my daydreams it is warm and sunny. I can smell the breeze and feel the sunshine on my face as I fold the laundry, imagining that I have just taken it down from the backyard clothesline. The weather does not worry me today because there is no place I have to be on time. Today I thank God for Sundays and daydreams.

newbuzz...Today I helped my nineteen year old daughter file her income taxes. She is a student amassing a great deal of debt to go into the teaching profession where she will be underpaid and overworked. She is already collecting bilingual story books that she knows she'll use in her lower grades classroom. She made less than $5000 last year and has already paid over $500 in taxes. Now she owes $41 to the State of MN and $41 to the IRS. There are few things more pathetic than watching a poor college kid drain the last of her meager funds to help the government bail out the big wigs on Wall Street so they can continue to live in the standard they are accustomed to. Too bad we can't designate where we'd like our tax dollars to go. I think ordinary citizens would be able to allocate resources more effectively than our politicians.

newbuzz...The economic drama continues. Now there is talk of two big banks becoming nationally owned. Yikes. I don't even want to think about that. Really. I'd rather drink coffee. Just for today I want to visit with friends and comment on the weather. I want to go to work and think about donuts. I want to catch up on family news and make plans for a summer vacation. I realize that no one is stopping me, so I'm going to brew a cup of hot, fresh coffee and pick up the phone.

newbuzz...I had the afternoon off work, so I headed out to do errands. I wanted to buy some party favors for Mardi Gras, but alas, these things do not exist in Minnesota. I did find some strands of multicolored beads, and they will do in a pinch. The thing that made me stop and think was the large display at Wal Mart of unsold Valentine's Day items. It seems that the recession is hitting Americans so hard that we no longer shower our Sweets with sweets and stuffed toys. Boy, lets hope we are not as stingy with our love as we are with our money. Otherwise we're in for real trouble ahead.

newbuzz...Today I was feeling "Spring-ish" so I pulled out a lime green sweater with short sleeves. This is more skin than I have shown all winter. Imagine my surprise when I opened the door to head out for work and found 1.5 inches of snow! Now I know how the first robin feels when she arrives at her summer digs only to find that winter has not departed. I put on my winter jacket and filled up all my bird feeders-I don't know if this will help the robins, but I feel better.

newbuzz...Anyone else a little disappointed with the stimulus package? I suppose someday I will get something. Hard to get excited about a couple extra bucks in my paycheck in a few months. I think the extra administration is going to cost my company more than it's worth. And I'm lukewarm about bailing out the auto industry-not sure if giving them more money is the best idea. Right now, I am working hard, paying my bills and feeling penalized for doing all the right things. I'd rather put my stimulus dollars into a state health care fund to pay for those with no insurance and those who are under-insured. I think we'd all get more bang for the buck that way.