newbuzz...I feel guilty because I stayed home from work today. I am sick and I just wanted to rest. I did not get dressed, I did not go anywhere. I just stayed in my pajamas and either slept or watched television. Now that the day is done, I feel a little better and I do not feel any worse. Then why do I feel so guilty? The sore throat and aches began a week ago on Monday. This was actually the tenth day of my illness. If this is a virus, I should be on the mend, but I am still coughing, my ears hurt, and I am tired. I have also earned 55 hours of vacation and 20 hours of personal paid leave time since January 1st. Taking off one day when I am sick should be a good thing. But it feels bad. It feels like I am breaking the rules. It feels like I am being dishonest or untrustworthy somehow. This is the work world that I live in. This is the bearish economy telling me to keep working no matter what. I should be thankful to have a job when so many others are unemployed. This is what I call the "worry" propaganda and it is amplified when we hear stories on the news like the recent case of a woman who was fired from her job because she was on Facebook when she was home sick. The truth is, I am thankful to have a job. But I am also thankful to have paid sick leave and personal paid leave. And I am smart enough to know that in business, you must use it or you will lose it. So I am going to fight the guilt, give in to the bug, and feel blessed to be wearing some really comfy pajamas.

newbuzz...I love spaghetti. When we have spaghetti for dinner I know that I will not stop eating until I am full. And I mean very full. No room left. There is just something about the combination of Italian tomato sauce with meat over steaming noodles that cannot be beat. The meat is delicious and the fat in it is certainly negated by the vegetable make up of the tomato sauce. And the empty calories in the spaghetti noodles are rendered harmless because of the little chunks of tomato in the sauce. I mean, when you really get down to it, what is spaghetti anyway? Just a lot of vegetables with a little other stuff. And vegetables are very healthy. You need five a day. I think the doctor would want me to have seconds. I have to eat until I am full so I know that I am getting all my vegetables in. I love spaghetti, and that is a good thing. Because I want to be healthy, and I always follow the rules.

newbuzz...As I prepare to graduate in May with my B.S. in Communication Studies I am full of joy, excitement, and fear. I am looking forward to having more free time but I am also afraid of more free time. I am excited about trying new things at the same time that I am afraid to to venture outside of my old, familiar territory. These are the opposite poles people visit when they are nearing the end of one era and beginning another. I am no different. I want to grow but fear that I will shrink. What I must do is march forward without looking back except to to congratulate myself on work well done. I will proceed through my future the same way I earned my undergraduate degree, one day at a time.

newbuzz...The fallout of divorce is far reaching and often unrecognized. It touches the spouses, the children, the friends, the rest of the family, the school, the church, and even the pets. No one is left without a lasting memory of the unraveling of the marriage. In many cases, the divorce is for the good of the family. But in the worst cases it is merely a continuation of the strife that developed in the relationship between the spouses in the first place. I have seen my share of troubled marriages, some that ended in divorce and others that were maintained. What I know for sure is that whether spouses decide to stay in the marriage, or leave the marriage, they will have to work hard at being happy. Life on earth is hard; it takes some effort to be happy whether married, divorced, widowed, or single. If you simply believe that walking out of a marriage will make your life better, you will be sorely disappointed. Until you do the hard work of changing that within yourself which allowed you to participate in an unhappy relationship, it will reappear again and again. After many years of marriage, I have learned that when I look at my husband with dissatisfaction, it is a good indicator that I am feeling a void in myself. Much like when I get a haircut to feel better, but what I really need is to lose ten pounds so my clothes will fit me. When I am in this frame of mind, my energy is best spent filling the void inside myself in a meaningful way. Then when I feel powerful and whole, I am apt to be more tolerant of his foibles and more satisfied with the marriage. I believe that divorce can be good for individuals, but only when they work to learn and understand how they are interacting with others. Since everyone will be touched by the drama of divorce, it is important for both spouses to find peace and happiness within themselves before they begin new relationships.

newbuzz...I had a really good burger and a beer at the local bar. This is precisely the experience that leaves me cold when contemplating vegetarianism. Though I love vegetables, grains, and legumes, I would really miss the smell and taste of cooked meat. However, I can only enjoy the meat because it comes to me directly from the grocery store. If I had to go hunting, kill an animal and then butcher it, I would be much more amenable to vegetarianism. I have never had to do any of those things, and they are very distasteful to me. But I have never really been hungry either. So I suspect that as long as it is easy to get, I will continue to eat meat. And if I ever get really hungry, I will go hunting.

newbuzz...My husband has been laid off work for about six weeks. Now he brings me coffee every morning and has supper ready every evening when I get home from work. He is doing the dishes, the laundry and cleaning the house. He is doing yard work and stripping down wallpaper and painting our bedroom. I think this is great. I do not miss doing any of this myself. Now I can spend my time outside of work on homework and hobbies. I am appreciative of his efforts, but not thankful. I am keeping it clear to myself and others that he is not "helping me", or "doing my job". He is doing his own work and picking up my share while he is unemployed. I think it is fair. After all, he is still getting a paycheck, and he has the luxury of doing his chores without two kids in tow.

newbuzz...For the first time in their lives, many Americans are out of work. There are more displaced workers than there are job opportunities. As a result, people are becoming more desperate and more competitive for the jobs that are available. One solution to this is a new phenomenon called networking. We hear about it in bestsellers, newspapers, magazines, on television, in the office, and on college campuses. It is touted as the skill that will help you find a job and secure your rise above the masses. I think in their vigor to embrace this idea, many people are missing the point.
The way I see it, networking has been around since time began. The only thing new about networking today is the capitalist spin applied to it. To me, networking is connecting with the people you know, who also know you and have some context into your character. Your network might include your earliest school chums, your church friends, members of your kids' PTA, members of local groups and clubs, business associates and friends and family. With this kind of network you are bound to find help and support in your darkest hours, including the loss of your job. The context of caring and concern is missing from the new networking. The virtue of giving to others is lost. Now people are instructed to collect contacts and business cards so that if disaster strikes they will have a network of support.
I think a person with a full network is one who has lived a rich life and taken care to tend existing relationships as well as make new friends and contacts. In my estimation, pursuing contacts with the single minded notion of how they will help you in the future is not an authentic way to live. I think it is better to enjoy the people you meet because of the exchange you share today. This kind of warm, authentic connection with people will enrich your life and your career and will stand the test of time.

newbuzz..Now that it is spring, I have run out of reasons to skip my daily walks at work. No more complaining with coffee in the break room. No more lamenting my spreading thighs. No more "if only it were warm", or "I wish it were nice out". Starting today, the rubber hits the road, literally. I have a perfect plan to get my daily exercise. My walking shoes are under my desk and my leggings are stashed nearby for those windy days that threaten to launch my skirt. Twice daily for fifteen minutes I will power walk around the parking lot while my body absorbs sunshine and vitamin D. I am certain that I will become healthier and happier in no time. I have cast off the notion that only 60 minutes of aerobics will do. I will not berate myself for having a simple workout. I will walk with a spring in my step and a song in my heart. Spring is here. I may not be The Biggest Loser (NBC 2009), but hey, I'm not the biggest loser either.

newbuzz...I was reading a friend's Facebook posting for today. It was about dreams and how they work for us by directing our energy towards a goal that is compatible with our talents and gifts. I have always felt that I am called for a larger purpose but could never determine what it is. Now I know that my purpose is manifest in everything that I do. I have been looking for a well defined cause or occupation, but I realize today that fulfilling my purpose is not dependent upon a particular job, charity, or relationship. Rather, it is the state of my heart and mind that defines my purpose. My dream is to help others in both tangible and intangible ways. My gift is that I am nurturing, kind, and loyal by nature. My talent is to remain upbeat and positive in all situations. My calling is to touch people with joy and encouragement. This is compatible with my dream.

newbuzz...Tomorrow is tax day and I don't like it. I have filed my federal and state income taxes, received a federal refund and turned it over to my state treasury. So I am in the clear, but millions of other tax payers will hustle and bustle to get their forms turned in before midnight. I don't know how to fix this mess, but there must be a better way for Americans to pay their fair share towards the infrastructure of our country. The problem is that tax collection is big business in America. Lots of people are employed in this industry. It is the same as so many industries in America today. If we simplify it and make it more efficient, people lose their jobs. I think the best way to go green and fix the economy at the same time is to take the pork out of every industry. Then, with all the displaced workers, we could begin to rebuild factories at the local level so items don't have to be packaged so wastefully for shipment from overseas.

newbuzz...I had the opportunity to make playdough cookies with a three year old boy and a five year old girl. I have not enjoyed playdough since my own girls were young, almost ten years ago. It hasn't changed much. The colors are brighter and the gadgets are different. But basically, it's the same old thing. Roll it, pinch it, squash it, cut it, pretend to eat it, and start all over. The smell of playdough evokes a warm fuzzy feeling at the same time it brings out the serious artist in me. I spent many happy hours in my own youth sculpting various replicas of household items, bakery goods, animals, and people faces. My all time favorite is the spaghetti pumper where you can make piles of strings which can then be arranged, cut, or smashed. Playdough play hasn't changed much over the last 40 years. The play value of playdough has survived video games, cell phones, computers, Facebook, the iPod, and adulthood. For this, I am thankful.

newbuzz...This sunny Easter morning in the upper mid-west brings hope on many levels. I am up early and can hear the church bells ringing in my small town. There are sure to be little girls in lacy dresses and little boys with clip on ties in church pews everywhere. For today, families will get together to collect colored eggs and to eat ham and lemon pie. Like Christmas, Easter has become a seasonal marker as well as a Christian holiday. You do not have to be Christian to celebrate it. In fact, Americans will celebrate the arrival of Easter whether they know it or not. Now that Easter has come, retailers can begin to sell summer. Everything from houses to lawn furniture to swimming suits to indoor and outdoor home decor will be advertised to American families en mass. While Christians mark this day with hope for an everlasting life, retailers and merchants across the country are hoping for recovery from the great recession of the late 2000's. I hope for peace, prosperity, long life, health, happiness and everlasting glory. If I behave as though all of these things are possible, I am likely to find them.

newbuzz...I have one small clump of yellow crocus' blooming in my garden. I usually have yellow, white, and purple crocus' along with a mini field of blue scilla blooming on Easter Sunday. Many years the flowers have bloomed right through the snow cover. Not this year. It is like all the vegetation went on strike and only the yellow crocus' dared to cross the picket line. I wonder what it is they are waiting for. There was plenty of snow cover this winter to protect the bulbs. The top layer of frost is gone. We have had sun and precipitation. Easter is late this year, but still no blooms except for my faithful yellow crocus'. Not a hint of a hosta or the tip of a tulip can be seen. But the yellow crocus' give me hope. I think Mother Nature is playing a little trick on me. Easter morning will find me looking for hidden flowers instead of colored eggs.

newbuzz...I was listening to a young college student talk about her unpaid internship. She wanted to learn new things but did not want to do tasks that were too difficult, or outside of her ability. At the same time, she was frustrated because her employer expected her to do menial tasks that she felt were beneath her ability. She was bored. Did she really say that? As an older adult with many years experience in the corporate world, I know that we all pay our dues, no matter how smart and well equipped we are to tackle the world. I am hoping that this bright girl learns sooner rather than later that she will gain more ground with humble confidence than she will with brash arrogance. At the same time she was demanding easy work she was affronted when given basic administrative tasks. Who should be doing the mindless, repetitive work that makes the office run smoothly? Why not take advantage of the intern in exchange for giving her a real life work experience that can be added to her resume? After all, much of what happens at work is boring. By the time you get into the really interesting stuff, you've paid your dues. And I have found that the cost of dues is directly correlated with your attitude.

newbuzz...I was feeling restless today because it is not winter anymore, but not yet warm enough for outdoor activity. As I started to settle on cleaning the house, I came upon some yarn that was leftover from a winter project. If it were winter, I would gladly make mittens, or hats and scarves. But making those things now just feels wrong. Instead, I began to wonder about what to do with yarn in the spring. It came to me easily as I gazed at the four complimentary colors. I will do what every good granny has done with leftover winter yarn. I will make a granny-square afghan for my daughter. I have gotten two squares done already and they are lovely. This afghan will be just the right weight and weave for cool summer nights. And for added fun, I will not throw away the tidbits of yarn that I clip as I stitch the squares together. I will toss them outside for my nesting bird friends to see what kind of afghans they make for their little ones.

newbuzz...It is cold, gray, and snowy outside. This should not surprise me on April 1 in Minnesota. I guess it doesn't really surprise me as much as it disappoints me. I was just thawing out my lazy bones and beginning to feel like taking walks and doing some strength training. The sight of snow on the ground this morning instantly brought me back to my late-winter blahs. Poor me, now I have to wear my winter jacket and gloves. My shoes might get wet. My nose will be cold. I will see my breath as I walk. Woe is me. I want sunshine and a buff body. But, for now I will have to be content with what I have.